Olivia May has a story to tell. Years of starts, stops, and self-doubt has shaped a voice now ready to empower and guide those going through similar struggles.
Honest, raw, and truthful, Olivia speaks in a voice that has been there, been through the struggles and emerged a beacon of growth, awareness, and wild, unapologetic self-expression.
Every day is so different...
It’s been a long ride trying to pin down who I am and why I am here. Some days I think I know, some days I realize I know nothing and that’s about it…
My deep internal struggle made life miserable. I was surrounded by kids who seemed to have it all, who seemed constantly happy… without problems. It was complete torture. I wanted to be home, in bed, alone. Not knowing what I hated so much led me to hate myself. I hated that I was alive, that this was the existance I had to live.
I spent years thinking happiness was “achieving” or being “successful” or “fame” or being “rich”, and that without those things, I couldn’t be happy.
I wanted everything immediately, and if I didn’t get it, I became depressed. Without accomplishment, I felt worthless.
Music started as an outlet, became a job, an obsession, an addiction, and then a burden.
I attached so much of my self-worth and identity to being a “successful musician” that I began playing my guitar less, hating practicing, and pretty much fizzled out to giving up.
I hit my rock bottom, and in “giving up” music last year, I was born again. I gave up all these beliefs attached to my goals, and found that what I wanted when I first started music - pure expression… music brings something out of us: a melody, a word, a song...
It’s a funny thing: sometimes giving up gives you everything you need.
It wasn’t until I made the decision to go sober new year’s day 2016 that i truly “woke up” and found the beginning stages of true healing, true knowledge. I have arrived at a point where I desire to truly understand my deepest inner workings. To find out how I can find my own personal balance, between body, mind and soul…
It took giving up a whole lot of bad to get to the good…
Every person I’ve encountered, and every trial and tribulation along the way has made me who I am right now. The gratitude I feel for all who have dealt with me over the years is something so very overwhelming. The truth is, I didn’t know love, or what love was, I never truly felt it for myself. I’m finding it more every day, and along side the man who has opened my eyes to something so much more than myself, I know that I am just getting closer to my truth, unconditional love for the self. We are all mirrors to each other. I want to be the cleanest mirror for you to look in. I’m doing the work and I hope it inspires you to seek out more truth.